Emotion Part I

//Emotion Part I//

I've been feeling a bundle of emotions lately...feel like a hypocrite...feel devoid of emotions...yet feel so emotional sometimes...weird huh...a lot of memories keep flooding back this few days for no apparent reason...

Let me start with the hypocrite part first..X has been pretty nice to me...but I just don't understand why he can behave the way he do sometimes towards certain people...it bugs me...X bugs me...that bugs me...I just can't understand...

but then I don't really have a basis to treat X the same way others do...cause like I said he has been quite nice to me apart from 1 or 2 occasions which he did something that pissed me off a lot...

I mean I don't hate X to the point that I can't stand talking to him at all...it takes really a lot a lot for me to be that pissed with someone...so far only one person has achieved that...but that was in the past...so let's not talk about it....but with that being said...it doesn't mean I enjoy talking to X...there are people you can click with...you enjoy talking to....but there are also people that you feel highly uncomfortable talking to...and all the talks remain very superficial...X remains in the latter...

But then sadly...for some reason...I just keep seeing X everywhere I go...and he continues to be very nice to me....haix...what do you do to someone to you don't really like but is very nice to you? I just can't bring myself to tell X or blatantly ostracise him...neither do I have the basis to...but I feel damn guilty whenever X helped with something...cause I've been talking about him behind his back...

it's like...i've been trying to be as nice as I can to X...and it just backfires on me....now I'm acting like a hypocrite....appearing nice towards him....but when he's not around....it's a total different story....

If you don't know what the hell I was talking about...then just ignore it...if you are X...and you are reading my blog...then it's about time you reflect on why people treat you the way they do....if you think you are X but are not so sure...my advice is stop being paranoid...cause I think it's quite obvious who X is...I might as well put down the name...But nvm...sometimes some abiguity is good...

Actually I have lots more to write...but writing about X just sort of spoils my mood....shall immerse myself in all the tutorials to drown out my not-so-good mood....shall write more next time...