//Semi-depressed//
I am in a semi-depressed mood today.
Depressed over what? Actually nothing. Ha.
This always happens when I'm too free or rather, when I am slacking my day away.
When I'm not doing anything in particular, my mind will wander off, hu si luan xiang, think till I get depressed. Bad.
That's a good thing about mugging. It keeps my mind off stuff that I shouldn't be thinking about.
Oh, and I am actually looking forward to my evening jogs..haha...
It's a nice feeling, to be jogging while listening to music, when the sun is setting, and gradually it gets dark...and I jog on...I enjoy that half an hour everyday, especially on days like these, cause in the half an hour, there's literally nothing on my mind, the music fills my world, and my mind is just...jogging, jog on! It's a peaceful half an hour for me.
And this time round, I will be determined, to keep this evening jog thing for the entire holiday.
Oooh, and my luck is turning around! I found my Galvanic Cell notes!! It's stuck in my bro's messy pile of worksheets, god knows how it got there, the main pt is I found it!
Woots, my luck is turning around!
Sunday, May 27, 2007
Saturday, May 26, 2007
End
//End//
Woots! The 1 month "mug-for-BT2" holiday is here!
Haha..how oxymoronic...got such word? adjective to oxymoron...like how moronic is the adjective to moron...
Unlike most people, I wasn't really looking forward to the end of term. I wasn't excited at the prospect of the hols. I sort of gotten used to going to school (after 11 years of life as students), and actually enjoy going to school! *gasp* It would be like my last term of actual school life come term 3. I actually don't want it to end...
There are actually lots of perks for being a student....concession rates...I mean..45 cents for a MRT ride regardless of where you are going is really cheap! Then you get all the student packages...like student meals at Macs/KFC/BK...KStudent...and all these is going to end like in a few months time! Can't believe it...
And as a student...you get paid (by your parents) to do nothing but study and get good grades!
Went for comm serve for the last time (officially) on Thur...it's kind of a weird feeling...knowing that it will probably be one of the last time I would be seeing the kids and teaching them...
It has been a fulfulling year at BHS for me...teaching all the kids..though I know I probably didn't make an impact in terms of studies...since most of them don't have the motivation to study anyway...at least I was there like once a week...to accompany them and talk crap with them...played lots and lots of hangman...drew for them...folded paper boats for them...
It may not seem much...and it probably didn't do much to impact their lives in anyway...but the very fact that they are there means that they won't be loitering around after school...hanging out with god knows who...at least they are hanging out with good people (like me! haha) at the centre...
And going for comm serve for me isn't just about the kids for me...through all the comm serve over the year...it became sort of a routine thing for a couple of us in the class too...so it's about going to comm serve with them too...
I always enjoyed the dinner/sweet talk/old chang kee sessions with them....it became a habit for us to walk to Tiong Bahru Plaza after comm serve...and we would have dinner tgt sometimes...if not we would buy sweet talk...or old chang kee...and sit down at some corner and start eating and talking...
There's lots of different combination...like there was once me mitch and ever sat at some corner with our sweet talk and just crap talked for quite some time..and there were a couple other times which we stayed qte late after comm serve at tiong bahru plaza too....and I remember this year, during the CNY week, me mitch and cheryl just sat the macs from 7+ to almost 9...just because it was CNY celebrations in school tmr so we don't want to go home early...there was even once when it's just me and mitch...and once when it's just me and ever...
other combi includes me mitch yuming ever....me mitch yuming and pauline....and earlier on there was xinyi, wilson, mann ying and a couple others too...just permuate and rearrange it...and you get the different combinations...
I am really really going to miss all the times spent at Tiong Bahru Plaza after comm serve...at some level, maybe that is why I feel closer to certain people in the class than others...I really doubt we can afford the time in term 3 even if we go for comm serve anymore...
So on the very last official comm serve day...me and mitch just went to sit at the different spots which we sat down and talked before...haha...kind of lame...but i think it kind of provided a closure for me...
Mitch told me it's not like we won't ever go comm serve again...but it's just like the last day of school in primary school...or secondary school...or last training in st john...I know it won't be the last time I would see my classmates, I know it won't be the last time I would be in the school, I know it won't be my last time at a St John training...but I also know that it won't feel the same anymore...
I hate for things to end...but I guess if I know it won't end, I won't treasure it as much, would I?
All good things must come to an end...
Woots! The 1 month "mug-for-BT2" holiday is here!
Haha..how oxymoronic...got such word? adjective to oxymoron...like how moronic is the adjective to moron...
Unlike most people, I wasn't really looking forward to the end of term. I wasn't excited at the prospect of the hols. I sort of gotten used to going to school (after 11 years of life as students), and actually enjoy going to school! *gasp* It would be like my last term of actual school life come term 3. I actually don't want it to end...
There are actually lots of perks for being a student....concession rates...I mean..45 cents for a MRT ride regardless of where you are going is really cheap! Then you get all the student packages...like student meals at Macs/KFC/BK...KStudent...and all these is going to end like in a few months time! Can't believe it...
And as a student...you get paid (by your parents) to do nothing but study and get good grades!
Went for comm serve for the last time (officially) on Thur...it's kind of a weird feeling...knowing that it will probably be one of the last time I would be seeing the kids and teaching them...
It has been a fulfulling year at BHS for me...teaching all the kids..though I know I probably didn't make an impact in terms of studies...since most of them don't have the motivation to study anyway...at least I was there like once a week...to accompany them and talk crap with them...played lots and lots of hangman...drew for them...folded paper boats for them...
It may not seem much...and it probably didn't do much to impact their lives in anyway...but the very fact that they are there means that they won't be loitering around after school...hanging out with god knows who...at least they are hanging out with good people (like me! haha) at the centre...
And going for comm serve for me isn't just about the kids for me...through all the comm serve over the year...it became sort of a routine thing for a couple of us in the class too...so it's about going to comm serve with them too...
I always enjoyed the dinner/sweet talk/old chang kee sessions with them....it became a habit for us to walk to Tiong Bahru Plaza after comm serve...and we would have dinner tgt sometimes...if not we would buy sweet talk...or old chang kee...and sit down at some corner and start eating and talking...
There's lots of different combination...like there was once me mitch and ever sat at some corner with our sweet talk and just crap talked for quite some time..and there were a couple other times which we stayed qte late after comm serve at tiong bahru plaza too....and I remember this year, during the CNY week, me mitch and cheryl just sat the macs from 7+ to almost 9...just because it was CNY celebrations in school tmr so we don't want to go home early...there was even once when it's just me and mitch...and once when it's just me and ever...
other combi includes me mitch yuming ever....me mitch yuming and pauline....and earlier on there was xinyi, wilson, mann ying and a couple others too...just permuate and rearrange it...and you get the different combinations...
I am really really going to miss all the times spent at Tiong Bahru Plaza after comm serve...at some level, maybe that is why I feel closer to certain people in the class than others...I really doubt we can afford the time in term 3 even if we go for comm serve anymore...
So on the very last official comm serve day...me and mitch just went to sit at the different spots which we sat down and talked before...haha...kind of lame...but i think it kind of provided a closure for me...
Mitch told me it's not like we won't ever go comm serve again...but it's just like the last day of school in primary school...or secondary school...or last training in st john...I know it won't be the last time I would see my classmates, I know it won't be the last time I would be in the school, I know it won't be my last time at a St John training...but I also know that it won't feel the same anymore...
I hate for things to end...but I guess if I know it won't end, I won't treasure it as much, would I?
All good things must come to an end...
Sunday, May 20, 2007
Bad Luck
//Bad Luck//
I cast this spell to find good luck
and hope my life will cease to suck
- Charmed
How I wish the spell really work.
When you hit with bad luck, it really does stick with you for a while doesn't it. No wonder they call it a streak of bad luck.
I dropped my burger on the floor during dinner.
I had a pimple on my nose, right at the same time when I start to have runny nose again. Imagine, rubbing my nose, with that pimple there.
1 word. PAIN.
I lost my Galvanic Cell notes. Realised it this afternoon at 4+.
I lost my wallet. Probably lost it yesterday night after Dance Night while on the way home (I clearly did take a bus home, and it was still there then), since I have been at home this whole time today.
Argh. I need some good luck in my life right now.
I cast this spell to find good luck
and hope my life will cease to suck
- Charmed
How I wish the spell really work.
When you hit with bad luck, it really does stick with you for a while doesn't it. No wonder they call it a streak of bad luck.
I dropped my burger on the floor during dinner.
I had a pimple on my nose, right at the same time when I start to have runny nose again. Imagine, rubbing my nose, with that pimple there.
1 word. PAIN.
I lost my Galvanic Cell notes. Realised it this afternoon at 4+.
I lost my wallet. Probably lost it yesterday night after Dance Night while on the way home (I clearly did take a bus home, and it was still there then), since I have been at home this whole time today.
Argh. I need some good luck in my life right now.
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
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Monday, May 14, 2007
Over
//Over//
So it’s over.
It feels kind of weird, that after weeks of training, the competition is over. I complain and complain and complain about doing pattern during training. But now that it’s over, I kind of missed it. It’s sort of became a habit I guess.
My leg is itching to do that side kick in my first pattern the whole day, especially after seeing how most of the people in the competition can’t seem to do it.
I wanted to win something so badly this year. Last year, I didn’t take the competition really seriously, didn’t train hard. Despite being in the category with the least amount of participants, I manage to screw up. So I told myself, next year, I must and will win something, for the lost opportunity last year, for myself, and for hc tkd.
So I participated, and did train hard. I fought hard for that individual spot because I really wanted to achieve what I didn’t manage to do last year. And when I did get it in the end, it sort of act as a confidence booster for me, and at the same time it gave me motivation to work even harder, cause in a way, I’m depriving someone else of this chance, so I don’t want to waste this individual slot that I worked hard for.
But things don’t really go our way in our life do they?
I didn’t manage to achieve my goal.
In the first round, I was unexpectedly calm actually. With 7 judges, 4 in front, 3 behind, and me alone on the big mat, I thought I would crumble under pressure, I thought I would screw up like I did last year. Surprisingly, my heart wasn’t beating faster, I wasn’t trembling, and I just did the pattern. I was disappointed when I saw the scores, 6.36.
With that score, I barely made it to the finals; I’m probably the bottom 3 of the top 8. I must say my morale was really low at that point. In the finals, I really wanted to give it my all, all my strength in the punches and blocks, get all my stances right, but this time round, I can’t really keep my calm anymore. Maybe it’s the results from the last round that affected me so much, but I couldn’t get my 100% focus.
I got a 6.72.
5th (out of 10 people)
Beating the 6th person by 0.02 (he got 6.70) and losing to the 4th person by 0.04 (he got 6.76). It was actually all pretty close, the person who got second got 6.88.
I am glad I manage to beat out 3 other people, but I really wonder if I am better than them, or if those 4 who beat me were really better than me?
Who knows, with a different set of judges, I may have been first, I could have gotten last. The fact that I got 4.1 out of 5 from 1 judge for accuracy and 2.4 from another just proves how subjective it is.
I got last (4th out of 4 pairs) in the pair category. I was okay with it, because I don’t think I did well. I wasn’t in the right mindset because it was just after my individual finals.
But when others come to tell you that we were much better than some of the other pairs, it kind of makes me wonder if we were that bad afterall.
I have seen it for myself yesterday, some blatant mistakes from some people who got ridiculously high undeserved marks. After my pair competition (my last event), I was really really really hoping and praying that both blue belt guys and girls team will do well.
I feel really bad and sad for the blue belt girls and guys team, and blue belt girls individual especially. They don’t deserve the placing they got in my opinion. They deserved much better than that based on yesterday's performance. But that's just my biased opinion, and obviously I am not the judge, so oh well.
I was really pissed yesterday, with some of the judging. Thinking back now, I wonder, are the judges biased? Or am I the one that is biased just because we are from the same school?
I guess with competition like this, where the difference in marks are usually so small, and the judging is totally subjective, things like this are bound to happen. Maybe they really do feel like those blatant mistakes are not worth making the team down or something. They gave the scores, we just have to accept it and move on.
At least I get to do my pattern 3 times yesterday. That's 3 minutes of pattern on the competition mat after weeks and weeks of training.
Oh well. Life goes on.
So it’s over.
It feels kind of weird, that after weeks of training, the competition is over. I complain and complain and complain about doing pattern during training. But now that it’s over, I kind of missed it. It’s sort of became a habit I guess.
My leg is itching to do that side kick in my first pattern the whole day, especially after seeing how most of the people in the competition can’t seem to do it.
I wanted to win something so badly this year. Last year, I didn’t take the competition really seriously, didn’t train hard. Despite being in the category with the least amount of participants, I manage to screw up. So I told myself, next year, I must and will win something, for the lost opportunity last year, for myself, and for hc tkd.
So I participated, and did train hard. I fought hard for that individual spot because I really wanted to achieve what I didn’t manage to do last year. And when I did get it in the end, it sort of act as a confidence booster for me, and at the same time it gave me motivation to work even harder, cause in a way, I’m depriving someone else of this chance, so I don’t want to waste this individual slot that I worked hard for.
But things don’t really go our way in our life do they?
I didn’t manage to achieve my goal.
In the first round, I was unexpectedly calm actually. With 7 judges, 4 in front, 3 behind, and me alone on the big mat, I thought I would crumble under pressure, I thought I would screw up like I did last year. Surprisingly, my heart wasn’t beating faster, I wasn’t trembling, and I just did the pattern. I was disappointed when I saw the scores, 6.36.
With that score, I barely made it to the finals; I’m probably the bottom 3 of the top 8. I must say my morale was really low at that point. In the finals, I really wanted to give it my all, all my strength in the punches and blocks, get all my stances right, but this time round, I can’t really keep my calm anymore. Maybe it’s the results from the last round that affected me so much, but I couldn’t get my 100% focus.
I got a 6.72.
5th (out of 10 people)
Beating the 6th person by 0.02 (he got 6.70) and losing to the 4th person by 0.04 (he got 6.76). It was actually all pretty close, the person who got second got 6.88.
I am glad I manage to beat out 3 other people, but I really wonder if I am better than them, or if those 4 who beat me were really better than me?
Who knows, with a different set of judges, I may have been first, I could have gotten last. The fact that I got 4.1 out of 5 from 1 judge for accuracy and 2.4 from another just proves how subjective it is.
I got last (4th out of 4 pairs) in the pair category. I was okay with it, because I don’t think I did well. I wasn’t in the right mindset because it was just after my individual finals.
But when others come to tell you that we were much better than some of the other pairs, it kind of makes me wonder if we were that bad afterall.
I have seen it for myself yesterday, some blatant mistakes from some people who got ridiculously high undeserved marks. After my pair competition (my last event), I was really really really hoping and praying that both blue belt guys and girls team will do well.
I feel really bad and sad for the blue belt girls and guys team, and blue belt girls individual especially. They don’t deserve the placing they got in my opinion. They deserved much better than that based on yesterday's performance. But that's just my biased opinion, and obviously I am not the judge, so oh well.
I was really pissed yesterday, with some of the judging. Thinking back now, I wonder, are the judges biased? Or am I the one that is biased just because we are from the same school?
I guess with competition like this, where the difference in marks are usually so small, and the judging is totally subjective, things like this are bound to happen. Maybe they really do feel like those blatant mistakes are not worth making the team down or something. They gave the scores, we just have to accept it and move on.
At least I get to do my pattern 3 times yesterday. That's 3 minutes of pattern on the competition mat after weeks and weeks of training.
Oh well. Life goes on.
Thursday, May 03, 2007
Irritated
//Irritated//
It's super irritating that 1 bad move, or rather dumb move in this case, by 1 person, left 3 people pissed and mad, including that very person who made the wrong move.
If that person didn't make that wrong move, it would have been happy ending for all 3 of us.
Dumb mistake.
It's super irritating that 1 bad move, or rather dumb move in this case, by 1 person, left 3 people pissed and mad, including that very person who made the wrong move.
If that person didn't make that wrong move, it would have been happy ending for all 3 of us.
Dumb mistake.
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