Blogging has became something that I do only when I'm very free and have nothing better to do...
Of course this doesn't mean I'm very free or have nothing better to do now...it just so happens that I don't feel like doing anything else...
Promos is coming...and the pressure is definitely on...never really felt this way before...
Last time, despite not putting in 100% effort, I know I can at least get a past and get promoted...but somehow things are not as simple now...without my best effort, I ended up getting "S" and "U"..and it's really do or die considering the weightage for promos...
People keep telling me to relax...telling me that getting promoted is not that hard...I guess I took the advice to heart too much and ended up relaxing too much for block test...won't happen again this time...and it's not like I'm aiming for 4 "A"s or something...I'm just hoping for a minimum of "D" in all subjects...I would die of joy if I can pass my maths...
So I've been out mugging...or rather I should say attempting to complete all my tutorials/work/practicals or whatsoever that needed to be done since the start of Sept hols, and sad to say, after almost 2 weeks of mugging....they are still not all completed....still left with Tutorial 7B and 7C for maths...
On the first Sat of the Sept hols, I was mugging with ming wei and ying cheng...first half of the day at amk library and second half at Sumo house...
After that session...I was waiting for the bus at the interchange....and while waiting...of course my eyes will wonder about...and then I saw a someone who look vaguely familiar (couldn't see properly as the person was back facing me) standing in front..at the queue for another bus...
So after looking closely...I realised it's Qingyi...with someone else obviously...haven't seen her since May...didn't really know what happened to her after she left school...or what she has been doing...etc...
For that few moment...lots of questions were running through my mind...like what has she been doing...is she fine...and so on....I wanted to say hi to her...and asked her all those questions
Then I chickened out.
I started to wonder...what if the bus takes forever to come...what if I have nothing to say to her after she answer me with one word answers...
So I didn't even said hi to her...in fear of the awkward silence that may happened....
So I continue waiting for the bus...and occasionally glancing at her...hoping that she won't see me...then in a distance...I saw my bus coming...
Then...I just decided to called out to her...it's just not right to treat it as if I didn't see her at all..considering the fact that she left rather abruptly...she seemed very shocked...like she did not expect anyone to recognise her or something...stared at me for about 5 seconds...then said hi...but by then...I was already on my way to get up the bus...
Throughout the journey home...I keep thinking...it's only been like 4-5 months since she disappeared from school and our lives...how come she seems like such a distant memory...seriously...when I saw her...it feels like seeing a primary school classmate whom I have not met for years...
JC life has zoomed past so fast that friends that faded out of my life months ago seemed like they disappeared from my life years ago...I have not seen Zhirong for only 6-7 months...and it seems like years already to me...I'm sure the class still remembers them...I know I do...but to me...they are really slowly fading away from my life....
Same goes for the TIP ppl...it's been actually only 5-6 weeks since they went back....but it really does seems like they have left for quite some time....
It's not an issue of whether we are making effort to stay in touch with each other or not...or whether we are too busy with our own lives to keep in touch...because even with the best effort...things still happen this way....eventually...both parties will put in lesser effort...and before you know it...no more contact....
As time goes by...people just fade away from my life...some faster than others...and some....I can say have already disappeared totally from my life...I really wonder...10 years later...how many of the people I know now will I still be keeping in constant contact with...cause clearly, right now, I have lost almost all contact with people I know 10 years ago...
It's like throughout the past 10 years...some new people enter my life...some left...but what remains constant is no one stays...and anyone who knows me well would know how much I detest changes....so this is a rather saddening fact....
And the most ironic thing is I started to think about all these...in the midst of all these mugging and preparation of promos..when I'm supposed to be the busiest and most occupied with work...
Been mugging at KAP with wilson and everlyn till late at night for the past 3 days ...the good thing about mugging together is other than the fact that we can consult each other regarding concepts we were unsure about it...we can talk to each other or play dumb games when we're sick of mugging....which is a good form of recharge...cause obviously for me...I am not the type that can sit down for 6 hours straight and mug non-stop...
We talked about rather weird topics I would say...weird as in these are topics that we wouldn't talk about normally...like....cancer?? We were discussing about us getting cancers....and what we would do if we only have like a few months to live...
Then we realised it's kind of sad to know that you only have limited amt of time left...cause you may want to live those last few months to the fullest...doing things you wanted to do but haven't....but where are you going to find companions to do it with you...everyone's still got lives to live...where can you find the money...so probably you will end up living life as per normal...counting down your days...
Must be the stress from mugging that is causing us to talk about all these...
Played a really dumb game today too...PICTIONARY! And I won!! With 12 points! We took turns to draw and so on while the other 2 will guess...We all had some weird drawings..and guesses...
The most amazing guess I had...was during the round wilson drew...and the phrases are all about our class...drew a whiteboard and tables....I guessed "ee loong sleeping during lessons" and bingo! I got it!
The most atrocious drawing...or rather the most atrocious intepration of a word is of course by everlyn....she wanted us to guess "Beauty World"...so she drew Earth...which was fair enough since the word is "World"...
Then she have to draw something to let us guess "Beauty" and guess what she drew? A girl...wearing ear rings...and she keep emphasizing on the ear ring....when we couldn't guess it...she drew some castles....then she drew a dog....
Guess what?? The girl she was drawing was herself!! In other words...she was trying to imply that she exemplifies the word "Beauty"...wilson and I couldn't stop laughing when she told us...then the castles were supposed to mean Walt Disney...and the god's supposed to be the beast..."Beauty and the Beast"...ring ring!
As much as I hate mugging...it seems like I'm actually having some fun here and there...and i am actually having more proper conversations with my friends while mugging as compared to times when we're not mugging tgt....like with mw and yc...or wilson n ever....
So there's good in it afterall...
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